What’s Crackin’: World Cup Edition

This Week In Stuff

It’s The World Cup Yo!

Get on your mesh shorts and paint yourself Brazilian because the FIFA World Cup is here! People around the world are going crazy over their teams and glued to the television to watch some really long (boring) football games. In the US I’m not hearing too much about the World Cup, mostly because if you’re into “soccer” you obviously went to college. Many people are currently protesting FIFA for the Brazilian governments decision to evict thousands of residents to build parking lots and hamburger stands. I bet Tinder is crackin’ out there right now!

Party Over, The Marijuana Breathalyzer Is Here

Everybody has been so excited with all of the marijuana law reforms going on, but now they are about to have the most paranoid trip of their lives. These days it seems like legal weed is going around like some shotgun rips in a teenagers basement. However, it has just been announced that an ex-mountie has invented the first ever weed detector. The dubbed “Cannabix Breathalyzer” will be able to detect THC levels up to 72 hours after smoking. What a buzz kill. How will they determine how much weed is too much weed? One joint? Two joint? Red joint? Blue joint?  Things were finally looking good for the dazed and confused, but the man is back to just hold us down bruh.

Sonic Seasoning, Lose Weight With Music?

Studies have recently shown that changing the sweetness of your food can be as simple as changing the background music. Research has shown that eating food while playing “sweet” music can actually trick your brain into thinking the substance is sweeter than it actually is. This is big news for US fatties that can’t seem to eat anything without a McDonald’s worth of salt and sugar in the mix. So what kind of music constitutes “sweet” music? We’re guessing some p&ssy sh!t nobody wants to listen to, like Michael Buble. I will personally be eating my nearly raw steak while blasting Slayer in hopes of making it taste like human flesh and demon jizz. 666 mofo.

Hipster Horoscope Week 1

Stickin’ To The Shade

As the summer stars slide idly overhead and people take to fun in the sun, the hipster shouldn’t.  Stick to the shady.  The shadier the better. One thing a hipster knows is how to be cool and any child can tell you that the sun is not cool.  Let your astrological journey lead you to where things stay cool all summer long.  That dark back room at the vintage store where the waist coats are kept.  The basement of the record store where vinyl treasures still lie not yet pillaged.  The drafty dungeon of an on-line gaming scenario. Your star sign can only be seen at night for a reason. When things are in the light, everyone can see them and that’s not what being a hipster is all about. Its about seeing what the slack jawed yokels do not. Stick to the shadows, stay cool and always keep your shades on.

– hipsychic Mark Sims

Bonus Crack

Swollen Members new album “Brand New Day” is out now. Grab your copy online or on iTunes.
USA iTunes
Canada iTunes

This Week In Camobear

Ariano – When You Can’t Come Home VIDEO

This week Camobear Records announced the first single/video from Los Angeles based singer/songwriter/emcee/producer Ariano. The first track “When You Can’t Come Home” is an acoustic song showcasing the singers soulful approach. Check out the video below and be on the lookout for his new EP Sad Songs Make Me Happy coming soon.

This Week In Cariboo

Hip Hop Karaoke - June 23

This is not “Ice Ice Baby” over a stripped down muzak beat in the back of the bar, complete with bouncing ball and cornball graphics. Hip-Hop Karaoke is the prime opportunity for closet MCs to finally grab the mic and bust their favourite raps live on stage with an accompanying DJ and a cheering, enthusiastic audience. Using all original instrumentals we provide hundreds of classic jams for everyone to flex their lyrical skill, from the seasoned hip-hop veteran to the casual fan.

The June Hip-Hop Karaoke also features the super special guest, the godfather of Canadian Hip-Hop:
Maestro Fresh-Wes for his 25th anniversary of Symphony In Effect!!

After you’re done slaying the stage, don’t forget to get back to cool with an ice-cold Cariboo Genuine Draft.
You Know How We Brew!